This morning is foggy, wet and gray outside. Inside I am not these things. I am radiant, warm and thankful. Though I don't always see clearly, I see much more clearly what matters. The rest can be covered in fog and stay in the misty edges, I will not go after it.
It is only by the sheer movement of God in my life that I can be so grateful, full of peace and joy and love at a time in my life when others may think I should be miserable.
Our house is still swaying in a limbo between foreclosure and short sale. We may get to stay until August. My Husband is totally self employed, he has no choice,and is staying steadily occupied. His truck was repossessed in November, friends of ours stepped up very quickly to let him use their work truck(they won't need it until march)I was laid off from receiving what has been a generous addition of income from my dad for doing nothing except being his daughter, our federal assistance for food(food stamps)was reduced to 1/10 of what it has been, and I am pregnant with our 6th child due in September;-)
Yet, I rejoice.
We get to move, my husband gets to work for himself, thanks to the income tax return, he gets another truck soon, I still receive help from my Dad for health insurance, but way less help than before, we always have enough to eat, this pregnancy was completely unplanned and a total surprise but we are so Blessed to get to have yet another baby to raise.
I choose to believe that God is good, He is faithful and He uses the simple to confound the wise. Having the "perfect" life would be such a bore to me, I would probably sabotage anything that seemed right if He wasn't working so diligently on making me into someone different than I was. I don't want my success to run ahead of my character. These are hard times, but they are good times. Times of clarity. What really matters?
"Let us acknowledge the LORD; let us press on to acknowledge him. As surely as the sun rises, he will appear; he will come to us like the winter rains, like the spring rains that water the earth."